Friday, November 30, 2007

Silver Bells

To start the Christmas season off right, I have listed my favorite Christmas carols:


* 1. Schizophrenia -- Do You Hear What I Hear?

* 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

* 3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

* 4. Narcissistic --- Hark! The Herald Angels Sing About Me

* 5. Manic -- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees

* 6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

* 7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

* 8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

* 9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?

* 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, JingleBells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ...

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

*Insert Juvenile Snickering Here*

I was over visiting Nina this morning and got the giggles at her post. It reminded me of the time that I had to type a letter and the client's last name was Horn. That name was mentioned many times throughout the letter, but when I got it back it had been circled all the way through. Seems that every time I typed the name I had changed it to "Horny." OMIGOD if that wasn't a Freudian slip nothing was.

Thank God I have a boss with a cool sense of humor.



I went to Washington D.C. (is there a comma in there?) for the first time when I was up visiting JC this past weekend. We went Friday night to the Washington Wizards game - the Wizards lost (boo hiss). Saturday night we went back for a Washington Capitals game. I love hockey and I had the best time, but it was COLD in there. JC finally got tired of me shivering like a lost puppy and went and got me a cup of coffee. (He's so good to me. hehe)

I brought a Washington Capitals ball cap back to give to the Boss Dude (a/k/a Acid Brother). He accepted it graciously with only a small sneer on his face. He is a football fanatic and hockey doesn't really float his boat. Alrighty then.. next time he'll get a souvenir from a soccer game. That'll teach him.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

The Tuesdays

I'm home now. It was a long drive from Annapolis back to Savannah, but I made it. The traffic SUCCCCKKKKED. The last 100 miles was stop and go traffic, which was weird because it was the middle of Podunk, South Carolina. There is NOTHING THERE! I could see no reason for the traffic to be that way, but nobody would listen to me yelling (typical).

Anyway, back to normal for now. I have about six more weeks in Savannah, and then I am on to new adventures. When I arrived at JC's house he had a surprise waiting for me, a brand spanking new cell phone. My cell phone philosophy is legend amongst my friends... I refuse to sign a 2 year contract, which they all take to be indicative of my fear of commitment. I have been using a Virgin Mobile prepay phone for the last 3 years or so, and it has worked out swimmingly.. until I met the handsome JC and I could not keep enough minutes on my phone for it to be much use. He gave up and added me to his family plan and bought me a nifty new phone. When I got to work yesterday I showed the new phone to former boss #2, and said that other girls get diamonds, I get cool electronics. He knows me well enough to smirk at that and said that he knows I love it. He's right. Who needs diamonds when there are so many nice tech toys to be had. hehe Now all I need to do is figure out how to get the pictures off the phone and onto my computer. Once I've got that down watch out... you guys (all two of you) will be bombarded with blog posts filled with cell phone pics.

My New Phone

Jess (the office usurper), has posted about some kick ass facial hair. She was showing it to me yesterday and I told her that HAD to be blogged. Go have a look, you will be shocked and amazed. I was, but I was more shocked and amazed about what her girlfriend did than the 'staches.

Brian J. had written a book review on one of the old Star Trek novels. He writes book reports quite often, which I find entertaining, but this time the author read the review and responded in the comments, which I thought extremely cool. He handled it very well. If something like that happened to me I would have just been shocked to find out that someone was reading this blog.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving

I am currently in Annapolis, it is the middle of the night and I am up blogging because I crawled in bed out of sheer exhaustion at about 9:00. Bad move... now I'm awake, it is too early to start cooking for the Thanksgiving dinner and my tummy is growling, but I don't want to make any noise and wake anyone up. This having to be considerate for other people in the household is going to be an adjustment.

Yesterday when I was stuck in a traffic jam in Richmond, Virginia whilst on my long drive here, I called the divine Ms. Odat to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving. The poor thing was stuck in line at the motor vehicles department. We then talked until she got home and was forced to hang up because she had to find an "implement" to remove an old expired car tag. Implement? I had visions of her trying to remove the tag with implements of destruction. No no no, that can't be right. Or a butter knife. Did she remove the tag with a butter knife? I think we are in need of clarification.

Okay. It is an ungodly hour at the moment and I am getting sleepy again. Time to see if I can make my way back to the bed without waking anyone up.

Goodnight, and enjoy your holiday. :-)

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

An Arse?

I hadn't spoken to the WRS* in weeks. I had sent emails to which he didn't bother to respond, so me, being me, sent him an email and asked what the fuck was up and if being friends with me now was no longer feasible, etc. His response was:

"Don't be an arse."

An arse? Is that what I'm being for asking that my BFF respond to emails? Is that a male thing? Is it the way men think.. if your best friend wants to know why communication has been at a bare minimum, do you guys think that they are being arses?

Just curious.

*World Reknowned Scientist

Holiday Happenings

I'm going to be running like a mofo until tomorrow. Today I have to pack for my trip to Annapolis for Thanksgiving (I'm leaving tomorrow morning around 4:00 a.m., yuck), but before I can pack I have to do my laundry. But before I can do my laundry I have to fold up the last bit of laundry that I managed to complete, but left in the dryer.

Today Jake, my poor misunderstood puppy, has to go to a boarding kennel for the first time. As of right now he is blissfully unaware of his fate, but it is stressing me out like you wouldn't believe. Can you say G U I L T?? I know its a boarding kennel, and I've been trying to convince myself it is like a doggy spa.. he'll come out of there all clean and all his shots will be current and his hair will be silky, shiny and manageable, but he has never stayed away from his home without me before. They even discourage bringing a toy with him because it gets lost amongst all the other dogs. OMIGOD what if he's bullied by the other dogs?? At least they are allowing me to bring his favorite food (Gravy Train, the beast is a Gravy Train addict), but what if the other dogs eat his food too? He'll be alone and scared and wet from the bath that these strangers are going to give him, and he'll have to eat weird stranger food. *Pangs of guilt waving over me* Usually when I go out of town I ask Jess the Blog Slacker to come over and walk him and stuff, but she will be out of town as well. Oh well. Hopefully Jake and I will survive the trauma.

In the meantime.. time to hit the floor running.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Friday, November 16, 2007

The Oven

Jake, my big ferocious dog who lunges and threatens to bite neighbor's faces off, is scared of my oven. I know I have mentioned this before, but there has been an "incident."

Wednesday evening I was cooking a roast in the oven. It was fairly uneventful (and smelled yummy), until I went to check on it and noticed that the heating element at the bottom of the oven was sparking. I don't think it is supposed to do that.

I close the door on the off chance that it was the oxygen disorienting it.

Slowly opening the oven door again - yup - sparks coming off the heating element.

I'm fairly sure it isn't supposed to be doing that.

Meanwhile, I had noticed before this incident occurred that Jake was practically glued to my side, which is unusual when the oven is on. He's usually hiding in the closet.

While I was observing oven sparkage, I was hearing squeaks coming from behind me. When I turned around, Jake was standing and peeking around the corner, and squeaking. My vicious guard dog was squeaking. Oh great. Now all of his oven fears have been confirmed for him.

But thank god the roast was saved.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

The Blogging Adventure

Yup. Blogging can be adventurous. Yesterday I hit the "Next Blog" button and was directed to a blog that had a trojan and a virus imbedded. It shut down immediately upon delivery, so I can't even report it without going through my history and going to the same blog page and getting the same virus and trojan on my computer again. Some people's kids, I swear.

I have spent this morning reading WW1: Experiences of an English Soldier. It is very interesting. The grandson of Harry Lamin, the English soldier during World War 1, is posting his letters to his family on corresponding dates. Unfortunately because of this I have so far been unable to learn the fate of Harry Lamin, so now I am anxious to find out what happened. I was particularly interested in his mentions in his letters about the Scottish soldiers and about how he couldn't really understand their accent. ;-)

Next, my good friend (online and offline) Odat was recently given friendship awards which she passed on to me.

I had posted the story of how I met Odat before, but that story may have been exaggerated. The real story isn't quite so interesting, but our friendship has endured over the past years and I expect for a long time to come. We're already making plans with the Bikerbabe to meet up for shopping and/or dinner when I move closer to them in January. It will be an interesting adventure. And an effort to stay out of trouble. hehe

Anyway, thank you Odat. Love ya chicklet!

I will pass the awards on to the famous Dustbury (a/k/a Charles Hill), with whom I had the pleasure of sharing an evening of rainy weather and mexican food. I enjoy his blog very much, although it does tend to make me homesick for Oklahoma City on occasion.

We need to hang on to our good friends, no matter how far away they are.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Dinner Time!

I thought you guys might find this post useful, in case you are ever in the mood for something a little different to have for dinner.

The Century Egg. Yes, people eat this. It is a duck/quail/chicken egg that has been wrapped in a mixture of clay, ash, salt and lime and left to do its thang for a few weeks to a few months. Looks umm.. delicious...?

Balut from the Philipines. Boiled duck egg. With the baby duck still inside. I did not take the time to learn the exact preparation process, but if any of you are interested let me know and I'll find the recipe for you.

Thought you could use another view.

This is a-ping from Cambodia. Grilled spider, seasoned with salt, pepper and garlic. About a dime per serving. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM baby.

Next is Sannakji from Korea. If you are interested in making this, you take live octopus, chop it into little pieces, put it on a plate, and ta daaa.. instant dinner. It squirms while you eat it. This one had to be shown on video so you can appreciate the culinary magic.

And finally, for the hard to buy for Christmas gift recipient, here are these gift items from Thailand:

(Found here)

Roasted Scorpions. BBQ Flavored even!

Cobra & Grass Snake Whiskey. I think I would be required to be already trashed beyond all belief to even consider tasting this stuff. WTF??

Preserved Water Scorpions (a/k/a Waterbugs). The description says that you must remove the wings and just eat the insides. It does have a shelf life of two years though, which could be useful in case of a nuclear apocolypse.

There you have it. Your taste buds can thank me later, although I do have to wonder if these things aren't made up by people in these other countries as a huge joke on us gullible Americans.


Monday, November 12, 2007

The Definition of Bravery

I have always had brown hair. Just. Brown. Of late I have been considering a change to auburn, but I was afraid I would hate it so I put it off. You have to understand that changing anything like that is a HUGE decision for me and I have to think it through all the way to the end. Actually, it only just occurred to me that if I hated it then I could just redo it back to Just. Brown. I had even discussed the issue with the handsome JC and said I wasn't sure what I'd look like with red hair. His response was, "You'd look like a hot redhead." Typical man. They just don't understand the thought processes of us girls.

This morning I woke up brave and now my hair is auburn. I LOVE IT. He was right. I look like a hot redhead.


*sorry guys, this one was for all us girls who have agonized over just these types of decisions*

Thursday, November 08, 2007

The Scoop

Curmudgeon asked in a comment to my last post what my plans are, why I'm leaving the employ of the esteemed Acid Brother. I actually love working for him, I have nothing but good things to say about the man. There is only one thing that would drag me away from that job and that would be finding someone that I love more than my job, which has occurred.

I will be moving to Annapolis and getting married.

Scary. I have been divorced for eight years now and I never really thought I would consider getting married again. I'm not sure how this has happened actually.


Wednesday, November 07, 2007

It Is Done

It's official. I have given my notice at work. Now everyone knows that approximately eight weeks from now I will no longer work there. Well.. everyone except Potty Monitor/Screeching Chimpanzee as I am making a conscious effort to not let her know. I think the woman has gone off her medication - she has managed to upset 3/4 of the population of the building. Gotta give her credit though, she seems to have the strange ability to do that with very little effort on her part. She has also resumed her lights obsession. Fun times will be had by all.

Anyway, I thought giving my notice was going to be the hard part, but I think the hard part is only just beginning. When I told former boss dude #2, first he yelled at me for not including him in the family alerts, but then he started planning a drunken bash/goodbye party.

I am soooooo there. hehe

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Whoa, Panic

It has started. Major changes coming up in my life in the (coming up hellishly fast) near future.

Scared. To. Death.

But I'm not the only one. I spent yesterday trying to calm down my partner in crime who was having the panic attack from hell (I say it was from hell because it put me through it). After a long discussion everything was calmer, everything was okay, and I asked him was he going to do that to me again. His response was, "I don't know." (sheesh)

At least he's being honest about it.

And yes, I know that this post won't make much sense to most of you who read this. hehe

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Twisted Faith

I've been kind of following this story about the church members who picket the funerals of our dead soldiers from Iraq, claiming that God hates those dead soldiers and is punishing America for our sinful ways, and causing untold amounts of pain to the families of these dead solders. There is something inherently evil in the actions of these picketers. Yes I do believe in freedom of speech, but leave it to people like this to take the issue of freedom and twist it to their own selfish beliefs. The father of the dead soldier in this article has successfully sued the protesters and was awarded $11 million in damages. Will this stop the protesters? I doubt it. They will just claim that it is satan working against their good works and continue it, claiming their faith makes them strong. Why can't people like this put that kind of faith to good use instead of causing pain to innocent people?

Where should the line be drawn? Countless soldiers have died to protect our right to speak what we believe, but is this taking it too far?

I grew up in a fundamentalist Christian home. I have never been one to judge others for having beliefs of their own, but so many Christians do. My mother, as much as I love her, is one of those people that would be labeled "far right." I do not talk politics to her (actually its just about impossible to as she goes on a rant anytime politics becomes a topic of conversation). She believes what she believes, and I respect her right to believe, but I don't feel the need to follow her blindly. Luckily for me, she doesn't disown me for our differences, or for the fact that one of my best friends is a lesbian, or for the fact that I will be living in sin with a man without the benefit of marriage.

Do the kids in the above picture follow their parents blindly? Probably, as they are just children and haven't had the chance to form their own opinions. I don't blame them for what they are doing, but I do blame their parents for raising their children with such vitriolic hate toward anyone who believes differently than they do.

Somehow the above picture makes the world seem a sadder place.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Celebration Overload

My birthday was this past week. I have to say that this has been the most eventful birthday I've had since I was a kid. I got more presents and was taken to lunch so many times that it had started getting embarrassing. I'm suffering from food overload... I'll be perfectly happy if I don't see the inside of another restaurant for a while.

I got this thing from JC:

I had mentioned that I loved popcorn but didn't particularly care for the microwave kind because it had too much fat and shit in it, so he sent me the above. I thought it was perfect, and shows that occasionally men DO listen. :-)

Number 1 Boss Dude got me this book. It is absolutely hysterical. We have had many discussions about my eventful parenthood and he has told me a few times that I should write a book.. that ya just can't make this shit up. I love it, hehe.

A friend from work got for me a Halloween coffee mug from Starbucks. I have been drinking buckets of water out of it, but now Halloween is over and I have brought it home. I will be drinking buckets of instant coffee out of it since around here nobody cares that I'm using an off-season mug.

Monday Number 1 Boss Dude took me to lunch at a Cuban restaurant here in Savannah. I had never had Cuban food before, but it was sublime. I did, however, put too much habanero sauce on my rice. Oh. My. God. Was that stuff hot.

Wednesday former Boss Dude and his (no longer new no matter what she says) assistant Jess took me to Cancun. No, not the vacation hot spot - the local Mexican restaurant. Steak Fajita Nachos. Yummmmmmmmmmmy.

Yesterday one of the other assistants in the office (no she doesn't have a blog that I'm aware of), took me to another Mexican restaurant for lunch. I can't remember the name of the restaurant or I would post it, but that place had the best Mexican food in town, I do believe. I was in misery the rest of the afternoon from too much cheese dip and from needing to lie down for a nap.

I have officially hit the point of not wanting to celebrate my birthday anymore... but Christmas is coming up. :-)