Friday, August 29, 2008
I am not a happy puppy at the moment and am so glad I am moving out of here.
I do believe a strongly worded letter is in order. hehe
Two elderly people living in Florida, he was a widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years. One evening there was a community supper in the big arena in the Clubhouse.
The two were at the same table, across from one another. As the meal went on, he took a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered the courage to ask her, 'Will you marry me?' After about six seconds of 'careful consideration,' she answered 'Yes. Yes, I will!'
The meal ended and, with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places. Next morning, he was troubled. 'Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?'
He couldn't remember. Try as he might, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her.
First, he explained that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he inquired, 'When I asked if you would marry me, did you say ' Yes' or did you say 'No'?'
He was delighted to hear her say, 'Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart.' Then she continued, 'And I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me.'
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test...
NBDC - The Illusionist
Nature, Background, Detail, and Color
You perceive the world with particular attention to nature. You focus on the hidden treasures of life (the background) and how that is affected by the details of life. You are also particularly drawn towards the colors around you. Because of the value you place on nature, you tend to find comfort in more subdued settings and find energy in solitude. You like to ponder ideas and imagine the many possibilities of your life without worrying about the details or specifics. You are highly focused on specific goals or tasks and find meaning in life by pursuing those goals. You are a down-to-earth person who enjoys going with the flow.
The Perception Personality Types:
P.S.: 24 Days to Talk Like A Pirate Day.
Ya scurvy dog who ortin' t' be keel hauled!
Okay the Yoda Pirate just made me giggle. hehe
Monday, August 25, 2008
And no, I’m talking about them, not me.
There is one link on my linkage that hasn’t posted in over a year. I have kept his link up hoping he would make a miraculous return, but so far it hasn’t happened, so I must sadly remove him. *whimper*
Another one hasn’t posted since last winter, but I keep him on there because he was my very first blog buddy/crush and I know he’ll be back. YOU HEAR ME SASSAN??
Anyway, those of you who think you can get away with only posting once every week or so, think again. I am taking it upon myself to make sure you blog often enough to entertain me dammit.
P.S.: There are only 25 more days to Talk Like A Pirate Day.
Friday, August 22, 2008
I did, however, come to the alarming realization that I should probably stop (or at least slow down) my free sample ordering, as I am going to be moving to a whole new area code in approximately 12 weeks. Since most orders take 8 to 10 weeks to arrive, that gives me only 2 more weeks of pleasurable cheapness. When I pointed this out to the Handsome JC last night, he became very still and quiet. I’m pretty sure it was out of fear that I would start having that stuff sent to his house. His only response was, “You can do a change of address once you move.” The man does not appreciate my frugalness.
He’ll thank me for this one day, once he gets a gander at my year supply of deodorant/toothpaste/razors/shampoo samples. In fact I don’t know why he seems so afraid of that aspect of my personality, he himself has, in the past, benefited from the razor selection.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
The first conversation was discussing her post on the standing up dead dude. I told her about the picture I found of the guy who was buried in his Lamborghini:
About the Harley Hearse:
And about the coffin sofas that are available in kickin blue, sassy red or in the subdued, yet elegant, classic black:
The conversation then gravitated toward my own funeral, wherein I stated my wishes to have my urn set in the middle of all my drunken friends and that shall be my funeral. Jess told me to start saving up because she sure as hell wasn't paying for that keg (what a pal). I've decided to have the funeral director rig my urn to occasionally cough and have puffs of ashes come out the the top whilst my pals drink themselves silly all around me. Good times to be had by all.
Later in the day the conversation was about a person here in Savannah who went to jail for graffiti at the parking garage. There were photos of the graffiti on the news online page, and the graffiti SUCKED. There was no artistic thought put to it at all, and now this guy is probably not in jail for defasing public property, but more than likely he was arrested for lack of artistic imagination.
This then led the conversation on how it would go if we were sent to prison for bad graffiti art.....
"HEY MAN.. whaddya in for???"
"C'mere precious, whose yer daddy...."
Or something like that. If it were me I'd so totally lie about what I did to be sent to prison.
Hey... I think I can get another post out of this one. The title will be: What I Did To Be Sent To Prison.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!
JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the other side..That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken 2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash or need to be rebooted.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Lo & behold, when I got home that evening and checked my email, there was an email waiting for me correcting the situation that I was upset about. He had bent over backwards to fix the issue just because I was upset. Nobody has ever done that for me before. Yes, I melted.
I’m thinking this man has got the right stuff. In love? Absolutely.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Go check it out and donate if you can. I plan to.
This guy, my darlings, is the one and only Karate Kid.. Ralph Macchio, all grown up. As cute as he was in the Karate Kid movies I think he is even better looking now than he was then, which brings to mind two questions: i) why do men get better looking in their 40s and women just start looking old; and ii) why isn't he on TV somewhere??
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Say it with me..... AWWWWWWWWWWWWW
The dress she has on was my daughter's when she was a baby, which makes this a doubly cute picture.
Monday, August 11, 2008
So, whilst in my bed of affliction, I have been laying here watching Karate Kid.. remember that movie from the 80s? I haven't seen it since the 80s and enjoyed it immensely. I usually get bored and fall asleep during movies but I made it all the way through it.
That last scene where Daniel wins the tournament is great, isn't it? Who knew that doing household chores would save you from an ass kicking and/or win you fame and fortune.
Friday, August 08, 2008
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
This was crawling across my chest. I touched it. It touched me.
OMIGOD I'm unclean!
I hate the south.