I guess you guys are getting tired of the complaining about my life posts, but some things are just too weird not to post so shut up, suck it up, and read this shit...
Bacon. It is not designed to be eaten raw. It is by nature a delicious treat, when cooked and all the nasties are removed from it, but unless you have something like this:
.... then eating raw bacon is a bad idea. It can make you deathly ill, give you parasites and weird ass diseases, and according to an episode of House can give you tapeworm of the brain.
Unfortunately for J's son, he never saw that episode.
Last night I went into the kitchen to cook dinner (nothing fancy, pancakes & bacon). However, upon opening the refrigerator door and removing the package of bacon, it was discovered that the bacon was mostly gone. The package was nearly empty. I was taken aback...when did I cook that? Did I sleep cook? I don't remember smelling bacon cooking.. OMG I'm losing time I must have multiple personalities. When did my other personality cook that bacon??
No. Nothing so interesting. J's son ate it.
As in uncooked. He said he didn't know it had to be cooked. He's 21 years old! Hasn't his mother ever told him don't eat raw pork or chicken? What the hell???
I was quite upset, not least because bacon is a helluva expensive item to buy these days, but because now I've got a 21 year old, 6'0" dude living under my roof that is going to get tapeworm of the brain, and I just know I'm going to be asked to change his diapers.
Things are definitely not going as planned.