Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Kid's Books

I have a new (improved) grandchild on the way, so in honor of the currently peanut sized munchkin, I am going to start a book collection for his/her future reading pleasure. I thought I might start with this list of educational gems:

1. You Are Different and That's Bad

2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables

3. Dad's New Wife Robert

4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share

5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book

6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking

7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her

8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence

9. All Cats Go to Hell

10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched

11. Some Kittens Can Fly

12. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption

13. Grandpa Gets a Casket

14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator

15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia

16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy

17. Strangers Have the Best Candy

18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way

19. You Were an Accident

20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will

21. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games

22. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan

23. Your Nightmares Are Real

24. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?

25. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School

26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?

27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things

28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry


Odat said...

Nice Gramma!!!!!! ;-d
(those are funny tho!)

Billy's said...

congratulations grandma....I like the choice of books lol :)

curmudgeon said...

BWAH!!! Some gems.

Nina said...

Funny stuff!

And uh huh, no way you're a grandma!!

Deb said...

Tis true, grammy to be here. I am resigned to my fate.

Jess said...

Grandma's are OLD.
But I am willing to buy some of these books for your new grandchild(ren)
I am just a kind soul like that. Now quit looking at this and get to work.

The CEO said...

Have you been to Granny Training School yet?

Your list has power! I need to go to the john from laughing, and Chrysler's going out on strike! Damn you're good.

Deb said...

I'm happy to have been of service CEO. I hope your trip to the john was productive.


heartinsanfrancisco said...

Great list! I've always wanted to write a pop-up sex book, but I don't know enough about it.

Congratulations on your expected grandchild!