Talk Like a Mad Scientist

Yesterday was Talk Like A Mad Scientist Day. Seeing as how I only know one scientist, I sent him an ecard in celebration, stating that it was about time his people were recognized, but pointing out the fact that he has been talking like a mad scientist for a long long time now. He responded with a thanks, and that he was then going to go to the lab and behave bizarrely without explanation. I reminded him to use the phrase "They'll never defeat me!" and mention "World Domination" a few times, and told him to laugh evilly.

I did fail to mention that being Scottish, I doubt that anyone would notice any difference in his demeanor anyway.

MWA HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA

I'm a Schmoozer

The divine Odat has bestowed upon my person the above Schmooze Award. I'm not exactly sure why, as lately I have been decidedly anti-social (as demonstrated by her recent message to me asking why I was "hiding"). I expect she's thinking about the times that I'm not anti-social. I suppose I should take this as a sign from the gods that I am to stop being anti-social and resume my schmoozing ways.

I'll get right on that. I'll start next Wednesday.

Wait.. I need more tea... be right back -

Okay I'm back.

I did a Google image search for the word schmooze and found this picture that expresses my true feelings for being chosen for this prestigious award:



Thanks Odat. :-)

Now, on to the fun part (and the only rule required as part of the award) - choosing 5 blogs that I believe have schmoozing power:

1. The wonderful C.G. Hill at Dustbury (who had to be included since he recently returned from a schmoozing world tour and whom can speak car language).

2. The lovely Shay at Endless Days (a talented photographer and butterfly mom, and who bravely sleeps through vibrating needles piercing her skin).

3. Exquisite Aisby at Maybe I'm Just Confused (one of the fearless - a schoolteacher and certified diver, although not at the same time).

4. The clever Soubriquet at Grit in the Gears (a poetic soul and also a cunning Brit, but as far as I know doesn't own any badgers or squirrels).

5. My favorite Curmudgeon at Curmudgeonisms (whom I expect to totally snort at this award, but too bad, he's getting it anyway).

Miscellaneous Stuff Because I Am Lazy Today

Ouch.

I got these pictures in an email, captioned about how the vet took over 1,300 quills out of this poor dog after he had a slight tangle with a porcupine. (The dog was okay, according to the email.)


Also, as a follow-up to the British spying squirrel post, there is this article:

British blamed for Basra badgers

British forces have denied rumours that they released a plague of ferocious badgers into the Iraqi city of Basra. Word spread among the populace that UK troops had introduced strange man-eating, bear-like beasts into the area to sow panic.

But several of the creatures, caught and killed by local farmers, have been identified by experts as honey badgers.

The rumours spread because the animals had appeared near the British base at Basra airport.

UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer said: "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.

(Link kudos go to Fighting Weasel, who left the URL in my squirrelly comments.)

It was a cunning plan.... ;-)

Oh.. and get this......

My son had forgotten his phone charger when he came to visit, so he went and bought a cheap one, charged up his phone, and then took the one he bought back to the store (sneaky). Anyway, I thought little of it, until I went to plug my cell phone in to let it charge. Yup. My charger was gone. He had returned my charger instead of the one he bought. Now I have no way to charge up my cell phone.

Oh well, I didn't need to talk to anyone anyway.


And finally, there are these, which made me giggle:

:-(

My several weeks of unfettered, ceaseless activity has now come to an abrupt halt. I have no visitors left to entertain, no places left to go, I am once again - just here. Don't you hate the let down after all the excitement has passed?

Yesterday I took my son out for seafood since he was flying out today (he flew out this morning). I am not a big seafood fan, but he is so I let him choose what we were to eat. I suffered through it and bravely (I thought) attempted the deviled crab. I wasn't impressed. He, however, was more than brave - he tried raw oysters for the first time. I wish I had gotten a picture of the expression on his face after that first one, it was absolutely priceless. The second one didn't seem to want to cooperate as well as the first and he turned a little green. He refused the rest and then moaned for the rest of the evening about how he could still feel the goo at the back of his throat.

I miss the kid already.

Those Damn Squirrels

My son and I recently had a giggling fit over the news that Iran had arrested 14 squirrels for spying. This act of rodential (I just made that word up) espionage seems to have made it into the international news:

Israel

India

UK

US

Australia

This particular quote is what started my offspring's and my own giggling fits:

Mohammadi asked me if I knew where the squirrels were from, and I told him that I didn’t know. Then he came to his own conclusions. "I bet they were British squirrels, they are the most cunning," he replied.

Even a day later this line brings tears of utter glee to my eyes. hehe

Poor Iran. I know exactly how they feel. I was inundated with French Assassin Mice this past winter. I showed them though. It seems the French government failed to train their Assassin Mice to resist the temptation and the danger of peanut butter in a mouse trap.

Damn French.

A New One

This article made me laugh, and even more so when I saw it was an Oklahoma thang. It also got me thinking (again) that prisoners have too much time on their hands and too much access to free legal advice.

I have to admit it was a pretty clever plot from an entertainment standpoint and I fully intend to keep this in mind in case I ever find myself in prison (I'll be completely innocent, of course).

I, of course, am a completely law abiding citizen. The only unruly thing I have ever done in my life (snicker) is make a rude hand gesture at the black Mercedes that was behind me honking their horn because I wasn't moving out into oncoming traffic quick enough for their liking. I hated to disappoint them, but getting creamed so early in the morning to keep them happy wasn't on my agenda for that day dammit. So I did the naughty finger at them. It made them honk more. I bet it as a prison warden in that car.

But I don't think I can be sent to prison for that.

Bella Breathe Broomcorn

I was fascinated with this email I got at work:

baghdad assumption dicotyledon cetera. consignor andromache cal armonk afflict bloat. cladophora afraid bedfast chevron astronautic bogota cheat accompanist concurrent. dirty croydon caprice backdrop colatitude anomie apprentice.

It wasn't selling anything, there were no attachments, just this collection of very interesting words. This one time, I like my spam.

;-)

Courtesty of Tarby (a/k/a Mrs. Roll)

A woman arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her "Hello - How are you! We've been waiting for you! Good to see you."

When Saint Peter came by, the woman said to him, "This is such a wonderful place! How do I get in?" "You have to spell a word," Saint Peter told her.
"Which word?" the woman asked. "Love." The woman correctly spelled "Love" and Saint Peter welcomed her into Heaven.

About a year later, Saint Peter came to the woman and asked her to watch the Gates of Heaven for him that day.

While the woman was guarding the Gates of Heaven, her husband arrived. "I'm surprised to see you," the woman said. "How have you been?" "Oh, I've been doing pretty well since you died," her husband told her. "I married the beautiful young nurse who took care of you while you were ill. And then I won the multi-state lottery. I sold the little house you and I lived in and bought a huge mansion. And my wife and I traveled all around the world. We were on vacation in Cancun and I went water skiing today. I fell and hit my head, and here I am. What a bummer! How do I get in?"

"You have to spell a word," the woman told him.

"Which word?" her husband asked.

"Czechoslovakia."

Before The Internet

The internet has become such a huge and commonplace part of my life. I have a hard time remembering what life was like before that fateful day when I decided to try out the free AOL for a month. (That was about 1997 or 98.)

But lets go back even farther, before I had ever even looked at a computer. Back when the only electronic things in the house were the VCR and the calculator. Or even before that..... when I used to go rent a laser disk player to watch movies. Remember those? I thought there was nothing better than to go rent a player for the weekend with a few movies. The only one I clearly remember renting was Phantasm and watching that while my (then) husband was out of town working. My daughter was just a baby at the time. (Yes it spooked me, thanks for asking.)



But what about before that? Atari 2600 anyone? My brother got one of these about the time that I got married (god I just realized how that makes me sound so fucking ancient). Anyway, when my husband and I would go visit my folks, I would play Atari with my brother. I loved it. It wasn't long until that was pushed aside by the bigger and better NES.



But before that?

Pong?



Does anyone else here remember how entertained we all were by knocking the little blip back and forth across the screen? Seems comically prehistoric now, doesn't it?

But before that? How was I ever entertained before all the fun gadgets were invented?

I climbed trees. A lot. We had a mimosa tree in the front yard that I loved climbing up into, especially when it was blooming. Nothing smells as sweet as being in the middle of a huge mimosa tree on a summer morning.



I rode my bicycle. All the kids in the neighborhood, including me, thought it was the coolest thing in the world to use clothespins to attach playing cards to our bicycle spokes so that it made a really obnoxious noise when we rode down the street.

I read books. Voraciously. One of the things I catch myself neglecting these days is reading an actual book. Audio books are okay, reading books on the internet is okay, but nothing compares to holding the actual book in our hands and losing ourselves in the story. This was my favorite book when I was a kid.



And friends? I had lots of friends. We didn't keep in touch through MySpace or Facebook. We didn't have MSN Messenger, GoogleTalk or Yahoo. We went to the actual outdoors and talked to each other face-to-face.

Unheard of.

Anyway..... it looks to be another gorgeous morning in Savannah. I must do what all adults do and go to my job and stare at the computer screen for the next 8 hours, and long for a nice mimosa tree to sit in.

;-)

Bits & Pieces

1. My son arrives today for a two week visit. Posting may be sporadic, but I'll do my best. Keeping this blog a secret is becoming a challenge, but that makes it fun. :-)

2. I was reading on MSN this morning about the male mid-life crisis, myth or madness. It makes for interesting reading. I only have one thing to say - men are not the only ones who go through it. Women may not go out and buy the flashy cars or hook up with the 20 something year olds to stroke their egos, but women do have the times when our lives as status quo are questioned, analyzed to the extreme, and sometimes ran away from. Men, if you wonder why your wives seem to question why you aren't the romantic man she sees on the television, why you don't bring her flowers every other day, why you don't do this, that or the other thing, maybe it is her version of the midlife crisis. Sometimes we forget that happiness is in our own hands. ;-)

3. Hot tea & cookie dough - the breakfast of champions.

4. I need to wash my dishes before I go to work.

5. My brother (the airline pilot), was talking to his girlfriend's parents about his wanting to propose to his girlfriend. He told them that his family is VERY religious, and that his family will insist that the wedding take place at their church (not true, by the way). He then went on to tell them that his family attends one of those churches that handles the rattlesnakes during the services, and that they will be expected to participate in rattlesnake handling for the wedding. I have no idea what their reaction to that was, but it had to be priceless. He finally came clean and told them it wasn't true. They must be good people if they didn't murder him on the spot. I am torn between being in awe of his wicked sense of humor, and being grateful that I never have to ride in a plane that he is piloting.

6. Why is it that weekends pass by in a flash, but Mondays and Tuesdays always seem to last forever??

7. I messed up big time last week at work, forgot to do something that I was supposed to do before I took off for my vacation days. I then had to go and confess my sins to my boss. It is to his credit that he didn't come across his desk and choke me to death on the spot (I fully expected that reaction). He calmly told me what I needed to do to fix it. I asked him did he want to slap me around - he said yes, but he'd get over it. The next day I bought him a pack of Guiness beer and emailed him to tell him that I was not above attempting to buy my way out of deep shit. His response was: "Bribe accepted."

8. I have a weird dog. He's scared of the oven. No kidding... when I turn the oven on, he goes and hides. I have no idea why.

9. I think I'll skip 9 & 10. Actually, I have no idea why I did this post this way, it just happened. I'm sorry that it doesn't complete the expected 1 through 10 set up, but hopefully you will find it in your hearts to forgive me.

Have a great Monday!

Dave

Dave over at The World from My Point of View seems to have performed some self surgery and has come out of it a bit ummm.. shall we say.... spelling deprived.

Go over there and offer him your support, and remind him where his spell check button is. ;-)

Yay!

I went to the metropolitan city of Hardeeville, South Carolina to have a mexican dinner and a beer with the wonderful CG Hill of Dustbury last night. Not only was the food very nice, but the conversation was fantastic. I am typically a fairly shy person but he made me feel very comfortable and I seem to have had a problem with shutting up. I felt like I was meeting a good friend.

I think we wore out our welcome in the restaurant though, we were practically pushed out the door. hehe

Weekend Plans

Normally I love Fridays. Having to work doesn't seem to be nearly so much of a chore when it is on a Friday. I get to wear jeans and sneakers to work. I can load up on caffeine and not worry about it keeping me awake too awfully late. Last weekend was spent with JC. This weekend I will be forced to entertain myself, which isn't nearly as fun.

I have absolutely no plans this weekend other than going to the hobby store to buy a couple of tubes of acrylic paint and work on the painting I started months ago. I have a bad habit of starting these things and then letting life get in the way of finishing them. I'm determined to finish it if it kills me. I had begun a painting from an old Japanese photograph, all in sepia tones. Browns are not the most cheerful color to work with. ;-)

Actually, the more I think about it, the more enthusiastic I get about it. I can't wait to start (and hopefully finish this time).

But I have to get that pesky work thing out of the way first.

What are you guys planning for the weekend?

Why Do We Do It

I love that phrase "delicious ambiguity." This is post number 759.

This morning I went through my blog links and read every new post. Two of the blogs were talking about our blog lives, why we blog, the friends we have made through our blogs, etc. That got me thinking about why I do it. The answer? I have no idea.

I began this blog as an outlet to help me deal with something I was having a hard time dealing with. That issue resolved itself (as things tend to do) and now I find myself almost 2 1/2 years later still blogging. At this point I can't say how long I will continue to blog, but I can say that the nature of this blog has changed. It is less personal than it used to be, but it is still my outlet. At one point I was posting several times a day, but these days I force myself to limit it to one post a day (unless, of course, something just screams to be talked about).

A couple of my blog friends have not posted anything new in over two months. I had thought about removing the links, but I like them, and I keep hoping they will resume. One of the missing was my very first link, but his life has moved on and the blog seems to have been left behind. But still.. I cannot remove the link. Maybe after a year or two.

I have watched one particular blogger go from not even knowing what a blog was to becoming one of the nominees for the Bloggers Choice awards, among many, many other awards. (Gooooooo Odat!)

I've seen people's lives change and read daily about how they deal with the changes.

My life has changed dramatically from what it was just last year ago. I still have the same job, same home, same family, but one has been added to the mix that I suspect will bring more (welcome) changes to me and mine.

So now I must go to work with the Insane Potty Monitor, the goofy office partner and the most excellent boss dude (a/k/a AcidBrother). And yes, I will continue to blog about it all, because at this point, it is what I do.

Another Oldie

I absolutely LOVED this program when I was a kid.

Powered by AOL Video

(Yes, I am a little lacking in creativity today.. so knock me upside the head with a kung fu chop.)

Brian J. Rocks!

I still can't click on my title bar to insert a title, but thanks to the brilliant Brian J. and his most excellent advice, I can now sneak around one of Blogger's infinite, charmingly annoying glitches.

Yesterday, after complaining that Blogger wouldn't let me have a title, Mr. Noggle posted the following comment:

You cannot click in the Title edit box, but you can click in the main body of the post and then press SHIFT+TAB to change control to the title, or you can press TAB from the address bar of the browser to get to it.

It's just not letting you click the Title edit box to set focus.

It works! I am so damn impressed.

Thanks Brian - and when is the next installment of Dr. Creepy??

(This picture may or may not be the wiring at the back of my computer.)


My computer wiring is on a very delicate balance. I regularly get dropped from my internet connection for no apparent reason. I thought it was because the cord I had going from my DSL plug to my modem was, let's just say.... ratty. Wires were showing. But we went yesterday and got a new cord and it is still doing it, so the 25 year old cord I was using was not the problem. I have at this moment a person who has a Master's degree in computer technology asleep in the next room, but even he is bumfuzzled by why I keep getting dropped offline.

My dog, in his infinite wisdom, sometimes chooses to curl up next to a bundle of wires that stick out at the back of my desk. When he does that - BOOM - no internet.

I think the conclusion that the expert has whittled it down to is that my modem is on its last legs. I just thought I would let you know that if that happens, if my modem dies, if I never make it back online, I loved you guys best. Wait... second best.. right after chocolate. (But that's still pretty damn good.)

P.S.: Is anyone else having trouble with Blogger not wanting you to have a post title??

I'm So Very Cool (apparently)

I've been hearing JC telling his friends that I'm such a "cool girlfriend." I am taking it as a compliment, but again if I think about it.. maybe I'm not being assertive enough about things. hehe

Last night he and my office partner (yes that one) talked me into going to a strip club. I have never in my life been to one of those things, and let me tell you, I will never in my life go to another one. For some reason the headlining stripper took a fascination with me.. tried to get me up there with her, was always coming and sitting on my lap and even squeezed my naughty bits.

Now let me point something out here. I don't care how gorgeous she was (and she was), if it had been a man doing that.. if a MAN that I had never met before now had walked up to me and sat on my lap and began fondling unmentionable places, that man would have gotten a punch in the face. No, not from JC, from me. I wasn't nearly so amused by it as were the people in the party with whom I had associated myself. I took it all in stride though, as we were in a strip club and that is how these girls make their money (no I didn't tip her), but I was not entertained or amused by having my tits squeezed by a complete stranger. Then having her standing up on the stage and waving at me while she was stripping. That was embarrassing. I get stage fright very easily. I don't like to be the center of attention - I don't even like attention to be called to me when I'm in the midst of a crowd.

I won't be going back there. (Unless I can drink lots more alcoholic refreshments before before I go.)

Last Night

The Handsome JC and I went to the movie last night. We went to see Transformers, the movie. I have mentioned sometime in the past my sentimental bond with the Transformers.. any mom to a little boy more than likely will feel this way. My son (who is now 16), absolutely adored anything Transformers, but his favorite was Beast Wars.

Anyway, when JC suggested a movie last night, the first thing I thought was that I would like to see Transformers. I really really enjoyed that movie. It was very exciting, the effects were very good, the kid who played the lead was a scream, and the car who chooses that kid was very cool (I want a car like that). The scene where the kid is being faced with a misunderstanding mother is sooooooo damn funny.

I tend to rate movies by DVD worthiness... are they good enough to buy when they come out on DVD? This one is a definite YES.

Statute of Limitations

I am probably revealing more here than any of you wanted or cared to know, but here goes......

Yesterday I arrived home to a message on my voice mail from a person telling me that they are giving me a courtesy call and that I am being sued and that if I would like to discuss it then I could call them. So, being confused as to why I would be sued, I called.

Many years ago after my divorce, I was financially strapped (for a lot of reasons that I won't go into here). I had a credit card that I tried to pay, but just could not keep up with the payments. As with a lot of people after a divorce, the payments got farther and farther behind and the credit card company kept tacking on more and more fees. The bill got outrageously high. I just couldn't pay so I gave up and waited for the ax to fall. Somehow I went unnoticed, and here I am, almost a decade later.

When I called them back, I spoke to the person at this place called Collections Exchange, and the woman claimed that I was being sued for that credit card. Luckily for me I know the law about these things, and I informed her that it was beyond the statute of limitations and suing me would do them no good. Now please understand that I am not an advocate of non payment of bills, but at this point regarding that particular bill it would be a very bad idea to make any sort of payment or even arrangements to pay, as that would restart the timer and then they COULD sue me. When I informed her of the statute of limitations, she stuttered and got very defensive, saying that the debt, although old, has not been written off. (I didn't respond to this, but seeing as how they are a company that buys old debt, that seemed to be a complete and utter lie.) She went on to say that litigation is starting on this and that it would be up for the court to decide. She was trying to scare me and it almost worked for about 00.02 seconds. But what she wasn't banking on was the fact that I knew what I was talking about. How many times has that tactic worked? Countless, I'm sure. She said, "Then I guess we'll see you in court." I said I guess you will.

I did an internet search for this particular company, and lying like that to people seems to be their regular M.O. They harass and intimidate. What seems to be their red flag is applying for a home mortgage, which I did several months ago. If they see that you are attempting to buy a house, they will jump on you and try to disrupt the mortgage process, hoping to get some cash. What they didn't know is that I decided against buying a house, so they can't really hurt me.

It is practices like these that get people into such deep financial shit. They have a credit card that for various reasons they can't pay, so the credit card companies continue to tack on fee after fee after fee, until the amount gets so high that the person thinks that taking their chances with being sued is better than trying to keep up with neverending and constantly growing payments. Then they have disreputable collections companies using threats and intimidation tactics to get them to pay.

I have to admit that listening to the woman's wheels clicking on the other end when I mentioned the statute was rather amusing. She just wasn't expecting that and clearly didn't know the law at all, as she informed me that I needed to call back today and speak to a particular person.

Yeah. Like that is going to happen. Sucks to be them.

(And just as an side note here.. I pay all my bills on time now. My creditors love me these days.)

Thursday - the New Monday

After having yesterday off from work, this feels like Monday. I also have Monday and Tuesday of next week off from work, and the boss dude knows it, so I will be slammed for the next two days.

EW.

Time for caffeine and lots of it.


I saw this over at Dustbury's and had to try it myself:

64%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

Mingle² - Online Dating

Conversations with the Best Friend

I was talking to the WRS yesterday. (For those of you who don't remember, the WRS is my best friend, the Scottish scientist, and also, by the way, the one who made my nifty little profile picture). We hadn't talked in quite a while, he's been busy doing scientific stuff, apparently, but after discussions about the terrorists in the UK, benign tumors, stupid doctors, family colds, etc., I mentioned that I had today off from work.

"Why?" He asked.

"Its Independence Day." I answered, with a smirk on my face.

"Independence from what?" He asked.

"You guys." I said, still smirking.

"Ah yes, you guys used to be our bitches, don't ever forget that." He smirked back.

"Used to be, that is the key phrase here. Until we kicked your arses." I responded.

He then went on to decry that particular line, claiming it wasn't an ass kicking, we just got too big. I responded that we weren't big at the time, we won fair and square.

"We don't want you now anyway. You'll let anyone in... we, however, only allow the best quality nutters into the UK." He said, in what I thought was a rather witty comeback.

"Good plan so far." Says I.

We have this same conversation every year since yes, I rub his nose in the fact that we ran away from their overbearing asses and there was nothing they could do about it, but oh how they tried. He usually comes up with something insulting every year as well as to why they didn't want us anyway.

It has become one of my favorite rituals. hehe

(Oh, and HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!!)

Christmas

Yes. I know it is a bit early, but being the forward thinker that I am, I am starting to think about Christmas gifts. I am considering buying the following gift for my office partner:

Donkey Cigarette Dispenser

You smoke (even though you probably shouldn't) and being the suave smoker you are, you want the latest in smoking accessories. Store your favorite smokes in this donkey's pack and when you need a fix, just press his ears down and he'll dispense a cigarette from his behind. Each 7-1/2" long by 5" tall plastic burro is a charmingly crude addition to any room. Fits about 25 cigarettes and comes in our illustrated window box.

This gift just screams "class," and knowing the person that I share my office with on a daily basis, she will absolutely love it. Also under consideration is the Answer Me Jesus. Last Christmas she was aching for someone to give this to her as a gift, so maybe I will oblige her this year.

Who wouldn't love a pink Jesus statue that has a slightly tilted sense of humor??

Maybe I should put it to a vote.

Which gift should my office partner get for Christmas this year?
	Cigarette Donkey
	Answer Me Jesus
	The class level of this blog has taken a tumble into the abyss
Free polls from Pollhost.com

The Monday Meme

I have been meme tagged once again by the Saintly Ms. Odat. I wasn't sure if I was going to bother with this one, but seeing as how it is Monday, I'm up at an ungodly hour, and it just seems like too much work to come up with something original, I thought I'd go ahead and participate while I sit here quietly and peacefully drinking my Full Throttle energy drink (sugar free).

INSTRUCTIONS: Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so:

Are We There Yet??
It's A Blog Eat Blog World
Thoughts, Ideas and Wildfires
Odat Mumbles
Boondoggled

Next select five people to tag:

1) Curmudgeon
2) Shay (Endless Days)
3) Hearts in San Francisco
4) Soubriquet (Grit in the Gears)
5) Billy

Then answer the following questions:

What were you doing 10 years ago?
I was living in quiet domestication in a small town in Oklahoma. My how things have changed.

What were you doing 1 year ago?
A long term relationship had come to an end, I was dealing with the aftermath of that, but mostly doing about the same thing I am doing now. My how things stay the same. (lol)

Five snacks I enjoy:
1. Fig Newtons
2. Cherries
3. Chocolate of any kind
4. Jelly Bellies
5. Nachos


Five songs to which you know all the lyrics:
1. I Caught a Little Baby Bumblebee
2. 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall
3. Comfortably Numb
4. Cooksferry Queen
5. American Woman


Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1. Put my kids through university
2. Buy a small house
3. Spend a proper two weeks (or a bit longer) in Scotland
4. Buy a new sofa
5. Pay off my parents' house


Five bad habits:
1. Leaving things until the last minute
2. Fussing at my boss for leaving things until the last minute.
3. Cussing like a sailor when I'm very mad
4. Thinking my kids can do no wrong
5. Thinking my ex husband is always wrong


Five things you would never wear again:
1. Capri pants
2. Stilettos
3. Bell bottoms (hehe)
4. That Grateful Dead tshirt from the ex boyfriend
5. Blue eyeshadow


Five favorite toys:
1. The Handsome JC
2. My laptop & wireless router
3. My set of the complete works of William Shakespeare
4. That webpage that has the retro TV programs on it
5. My new photo printer

Phobophobia- Fear of phobias

Phobias. Everyone has them (most everyone, anyway). My personal phobias are heights and drowning. What I find funny about it though are the names that are attached to these fears. I never remember what my two phobias are called, I just know that the thought of being somewhere high or having water covering my face makes my heart pound, and that is just the thought of those things. I've listed some of the funnier ones:

• Zemmiphobia- Fear of the great mole rat
• Xanthophobia- Fear of the color yellow or the word yellow
• Walloonphobia- Fear of the Walloons
• Teutophobia- Fear of German or German things
• Taeniophobia or Teniophobia- Fear of tapeworms
• Sinophobia- Fear of Chinese, Chinese culture
• Sesquipedalophobia- Fear of long words
• Scabiophobia- Fear of scabies
• Russophobia- Fear of Russians
• Pupaphobia - Fear of puppets
• Ponophobia- Fear of overworking or of pain
• Politicophobia- Fear or abnormal dislike of politicians
• Phronemophobia- Fear of thinking
• Peladophobia- Fear of bald people
• Panophobia or Pantophobia- Fear of everything
• Optophobia- Fear of opening one's eyes
• Oneirogmophobia- Fear of wet dreams
• Nomatophobia- Fear of names
• Medorthophobia- Fear of an erect penis
• Lutraphobia- Fear of otters
• Levophobia- Fear of things to the left side of the body
• Japanophobia- Fear of Japanese
• Judeophobia- Fear of Jews
• Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words
• Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia- Fear of the number 666
• Genuphobia- Fear of knees
• Geniophobia- Fear of chins
• Gallophobia or Galiophobia- Fear France or French culture
• Euphobia- Fear of hearing good news
• Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch
• Dextrophobia- Fear of objects at the right side of the body
• Deipnophobia- Fear of dining or dinner conversations
• Coulrophobia- Fear of clowns
• Consecotaleophobia- Fear of chopsticks
• Bolshephobia- Fear of Bolsheviks
• Barophobia- Fear of gravity
• Auroraphobia- Fear of Northern lights
• Aulophobia- Fear of flutes
• Athazagoraphobia- Fear of being forgotton or ignored
• Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth
• Apiphobia- Fear of bees
• Anglophobia- Fear of England or English culture
• Anablephobia- Fear of looking up
• Alliumphobia- Fear of garlic
• Alektorophobia- Fear of chickens

Do any of these things frighten you?